Interview with an Empty Artist

Maya Sinji Jung is a Korean born artist and photographer. Her works are highly respected in both Flickr and JPG Mag. I recently got in touch with her and made an interview with her over Skype.

Jaakko: How are you, and how is everything?

Sinji:  It’s fantastic, it’s great. You know many things happened like for everyone else, but I think I’ve finally found kind of peace, in my family and in my island.. Many strange experiences, like temple stayings just came to my life, and things like that.. it’s getting good..

Jaakko: I saw your poem in JPG Mag. As many other readers, I thought it was very beautiful and unique. What inspired you to create it?

Sinji: It was actually my experience about a loss of a relationship, a very personal thing. I never really used my imagination for that and it was very natural for me to put my words and experiences into the poem. And then, I was thinking responsibilities, and lots of things which are connected..

Jaakko: And then you took those experiences and emotions and you created a beautiful art work out of that..

Sinji:  I do all kinds of things, I sing and play piano, write and sometimes I paint.. When I was student I used to stay in library all day long.. taking photos used to be just a little thing for me.

But since I started relationship it became really really big, you know. I didn’t even expect  it. And I always recorded myself to show and introduce myself to the person. And it begins like that actually, all of my photo activities, it started from that love accident, because I was ex-girlfriend of a photographer.

It (relationship) was a really big thing, you know, for me at least.. and then..  suddenly, like BOOM! It was gone! Last six months was really hard for me.. And I’m now I’m back in Korea, here in my home land. The poem I wrote was a kind of struggling with myself to identify who was I in that relationship and who am I in family and in this society.

Jaakko: Do you ever feel empty after creating a certain artwork?

Sinji: I’m always empty! (laugh)  Actually, I never feel empty after I create some art work. And I thought “maybe I’m not artist” if I don’t feel empty after that.. (laugh)  I feel empty before I make art work.

But you know, my emptiness and hunger could be the same like, shadow and a light. I’m very hungry for creating, and expressing the emptiness.

Jaakko: Does beauty equal pain?

Sinji: It could have something to do with emptiness and hunger and shadow and light.. But I don’t think that you have to be painful to create something beautiful, but..

I just saw a documentary film a few years ago about dragon fly, they stay, months or years under the water. They eat lots of things, and it looks really ugly, but it looks kind of struggling, looks painful.. to make their body grow. And I don’t know if they know that they will become dragonfly or not, but then they  come out of the water, and take off their old clothes and put on new ones..

Jaakko: Responsibility is often the theme in your works. What do you think about responsibility of a human being?

Sinji: (Responsibility).. is to know, what kind of layers you are wearing. We can’t really ask someone to take them off; we are wearing those, whether we like or not. To recognize that fact, that actually I’m wearing this layer and that layer, and people call me blah blah blah in this society, and some people call me with another name .. so you know, just accept the layers and stand there; that itself could be the responsibility.

I actually took the photo, and made the title, because I had this argument inside of myself. Someone told me that I’m doing all my responsibility, but then I couldn’t see him doing his responsibility at all in my point of view. People think that responsibility is really something big or something like that.. And then that person is trying to wear someone else’s responsibility by talking and covering up himself. What I wanted to tell us was that we don’t have to speak about it, just accept ourselves in that space, where we are standing. The big stone doesn’t know why it is there….

Jaakko: That’s a very buddhist way of thinking..

Sinji: I’m not a buddhist! (Laughs) But I experienced the time in the temple.. and maybe my philosophy is influenced by buddhism, because it was my environment too in this country, and then actually one of my parents is a buddhist. It became part of my philosophy very naturally. Well, now I see I am a buddhist.

Jaakko: What do you think about Buddhist detachment?

Sinji: It’s the fear. You don’t want to be refused, or ignored, or misunderstood by others or those you call your friends. It’s all common sense for human beings. But the distance is always there, even with your very very best friend or parents, or whoever.  The fear is always there.

But when I was in the temple, I was meditating and reading, and when I was doing that, I really focused in myself, to breath, sitting and reading sanskrit. I basically didn’t know what I was reading, but the monks gave me one page and told me to read it with my voice, following my breath.

The first day, I was just focusing on the letters and reading. And the second day, I started to think about, you know my business in my mind.  And then I asked the monk “I heard that when you do this meditation, your unnecessary thoughts have to go away, but my mind is full of regrets and full of my plans, present and future.. because I’m just sitting here!”

Then the  monk said “No problem! Just do what you do. The feelings and sadness will come to revisit you while you are reading, but just keep reading. Then the next step will come.”

And I did it.. for two days. Then I noticed while I’m reading, there are no thoughts. I might have thought occasionally the meaning of what I was reading, but actually there was nothing in my mind. I just focused on that moment and then those kind of distances between me, and my thoughts came. I felt there was really some big things going on. It was really huge experience. And then there was almost zero distance between me and others.

It might be impossible to get rid of the fear from our bodies, but if you try, maybe those little moments, will give you a kind of hint.

Jaakko: (about sadness..)

Sinji: .. in human world, where everyone’s struggling.. none of that sadness is bigger or smaller than the others. None of that can be compared. Your sadness is the biggest one for you, for me, mine is the biggest one in the world for me!

Jaakko: Yeah.. sometimes I get this feeling like “Come on, I don’t have a culture!”. Do you ever feel the same?

Sinji: You will never believe, but I know exactly what you’re speaking. You have blue eyes and white face and everyone can say you’re a white man from Europe or wherever, and then I’m Asian. We’re not mixed kids, you know, physically… So probably people will say “Oh, you have your Finnish culture, you have your Korean culture, you have your Asian culture”.

Since I was a kid I was ALWAYS a foreigner. Like “who you are?” was always the question. Whole through my life, I was a bit different.

People said to me always “oh, you’re little different”.

When I went to Japan, I really wanted to make sure that I’m treated the same as others, so I studied Japanese hard, until I mastered the language. But still, even after I had mastered Japanese, people treated me the same, they couldn’t accept “my culture”, which is made by my authentic ways, you know. Not so many people can truely accept and understand that all of us have their own culture. In that sense, I am trying to be an inter-cultural person: I am doing all my art work to share my culture with others, and hopefully it could make some kind of peaceful communication if you let me get in your world.

You can find Maya Sinji Jung’s work in Flickr: http://www.flickr.com/photos/mayasinjijung/
and in JPG Mag: http://jpgmag.com/people/mayacafe

Minority Report

Since I was a kid, doctors concluded that my heart was “a little different”. There was an extra beat in there, and I had to go to these rather clinical tests where they put sensors in my body and tried to research the abnormality. Because I had to stay away from school those times, and my “a little different” nature; I was constantly bullied.

But somehow in my adolescence, the doctors concluded that my heart will continue beating just fine even if placed under heavy stress. Therefore I was not allowed the exception; I had to join the Finnish Army.

Somehow, in my environment I really had no choice of civilian service. So I decided alone that I have to bite the bullet and go through the service like everyone else.

I was recruited as an engineer; one of the hardest jobs in the army. It includes carrying heavy mines on your back.

Because of my little different heart, my physical strength just didn’t match the others. Within one week from the start of my recruitment, I fell into a hole in the obstacle course and hurt my back.

I was in pretty bad shape. My disc in my back bone got ruptured and caused infection in the spine. That caused high fever. In addition all kinds of other ailments came up during the time when I was in the hospital, including gall stones which required surgery within a year of that event. I had awful pain in my back and I screamed at night.

They shot morphine-derivative in me.

It was like a crazy dream, which only got worse. I was lucky enough to be repatriated after I signed the document in which I stated that my mental condition wasn’t good enough in order to operate in the force.

When I returned my home five months earlier as others, I was a minority.

Even today I depend in my “little different” heart.

I don’t think I’m such a brave person, but I am very proud that I discovered my difference, and my sensitivity.
I continue to call myself as minority. Not a world citizen but world foreigner.

It is a status I intend to keep.

Three Months with Fujifilm X100

I have been using Fujifilm Finepix X100 for three months now. I’d like to give a kind of update of how it’s been.

After I got X100 and the replacement unit since the the original copy of the camera got the infamous stuck aperture issue, I’ve been shooting photos with it in daily basis. X100 has became my primary camera, the camera that’s with me everyday, pretty much where-ever I go. And like Chase Jarvis says, “the best camera is the one you have with you”. In my case, it has been the X100.

After I updated the camera’s firmware into the latest version, I noticed speed increase in autofocus and also some of the fixes of the quirks in the UI. The menu is still what it is, and the control wheel on back is flimsy, but at least there is that dedicated ISO button that saves you the dive in the menus.

I just love the JPG’s straight out from the camera; the in-camera processing is just great. The sharpening is set just right, the output is very crisp but clean, and free of any artifacts. And if I shoot RAW, I can process the RAWs inside the camera.

I still haven’t got around in installing the included RAW processing software that came in the CD’s..

I love the film simulation of the camera. It’s more than a gimmick, it really makes sense, Velvia and Astia look just like their film counterparts, the effect is subtle enough not to make irreversible changes in the images, but still packs a punch.

Sure, I prefer to do the monochrome conversion in Aperture because then I can have full control over the RGB channels, so I actually never use the in-camera monochrome setting, although that might make sense for some.

The number one feature of this camera, what I’ve gotten used to, is of course the excellent optical viewfinder. I use EVF or LCD only when shooting macros.

Of course, it doesn’t compare to shooting with range finder, but the OVF is really best I’ve ever seen in compact size digital camera. The frame lines work perfectly and when you set up the automatic parallax correction including correction of AF point, you can pretty much forget that the (parallax) phenomena ever existed. And you can even see live histogram in OVF as an overlay if you choose so; OVF overlay is excellent and unique innovation from Fujifilm.

The manual controls are excellent in daily use, especially the aperture ring and shutter speed control dial. Set either of those to auto and you get shutter speed or aperture priority. Very, delightfully “analogue” process.

Strangely, I find that there’s really not so much need to use the menus under normal outdoor conditions when shooting.

In my extensive tests, I find the battery life of X100 to be very good. In my normal shooting conditions I always shoot with OVF and I’ve taken like 300 pictures and never exhausted a battery yet. I keep extra accessory battery in my pocket just in case.

One thing worth noting is that unlike in Canon SLR’s, the USB port is not standard mini-USB port, but something which seems unique to Fujifilm’s camera. So it’s better not to lose that cord.

I bought the EF-20 external flash unit for this camera and I find it a very nice little flash. It packs enough punch and allows tilting upwards 90 degrees, great for those indoor parties and events with white roofs. The larger version of the flash also allows swiveling, a pro feature.

Overall feeling after three months of daily shooting, I just love this camera. The image quality produced by the custom glass and sensor is just great. X100 is almost completely silent, professional quality camera in a very compact package.

Short Movie

I often feel, or notice that I’m sensitive about things that people around me barely notice. I’m not talking about art; that’s another topic; I’m talking about just normal things people encounter in their daily lives. As a result, I often feel I’m not made for this world, you know that I don’t quite belong here!

This is the starting point for my new movie. Theme of this project is about protecting the sensitivity we see in others, that something invisible what we feel so familiar with. Perhaps, because we ourselves often feel we need that same protection. We want someone to recognize that something most important thing in ourselves, and then take great care of it, nurturing it and making it grow, like a plant.

To make a story of a photographer is nothing new or unique, but I feel that it makes perfect, artistic context to the theme.

I plan to shoot this short movie in summer, and I’m looking for volunteers. Since this is independent movie and no commercial profit will be made from this, I cannot pay any salaries.

However, I strongly believe that this is something important and beneficial for the world, so in this regard, I am not ashamed to ask your volunteer help to realize this.

Let me know if you are interested, and let’s formulate a concrete plan to realize the production.

僕は、ほかの人がほとんど見落としそうないろいろなことについて繊細です。僕がいっているのは芸術的な物事についてだけではありません。もっと人々が日常生活のなかで出会うような様々なことについても繊細にいろいろな感覚を感じます。そのことから、僕はよく自分はこの世界のために作られたのではないのではないか、本当に自分はこの世界に属しているのだろうかと考えることがあります。

このことが今回の僕の新しい映画の出発点です。このプロジェクトのテーマは、僕たちが他の人の中にみる何か目に見えないけども共感できる繊細さを守ることです。おそらく、僕らはそうやってお互いにその繊細さを守る必要があるのです。そして僕らは僕らにとって僕らの中の一番大切なものを、植物を育てるかのように大切にし、力をくれ、育ててくれる誰かを必要としています。

写真家についてのストーリを作ることは、何も新しいことではありません。しかしこのことは今回のテーマを表すための最もよい手段なのです。

僕は、この夏に写真家を主人公としたショートムービーを作る予定です。そしてそれを手伝ってくれる人を捜しています。これは個人で独立して作る映画であるので、この映画の作成から何かの金銭的な利益を得られるものではありません。また、これによりボランティアで制作に参加していただいた方に何かお金を支払ったりすることもできません。

しかし、僕はこの短編映画の作成は、何かこの世界に対して価値のあることであると強く信じています。そしてこの思いからボランティアで参加してくださる方を募ることを恥ずかしいとは感じていません。

もし、あなたがこのことに興味があるならぜひ教えてください。これを実現するための具体的な計画を一緒に話し合えればいいなと思います。

Norwegian Wood

Norwegian Wood is a novel written by Murakami Haruki. The novel was released in 1987 and made it’s author a superstar among Japanese youth. The novel is a nostalgic story of loss and sexuality, and also about the late 60’s Tokyo, student protests and college life. And the name of the novel is borrowed from the Beatles song.

I was thrilled when I first heard that the movie was made Tran Anh Hung. I have always been big fan of his films such as The Scent of Green Papaya and Vertical Ray of the Sun. I’ve felt that Tran Anh Hung is realizing the visual culture of his home country, the colors and tone, there’s something very genuine and true about it; I imagine that’s how life in Vietnam looks like.

In that sense Norwegian Wood felt oddly a bit like Vietnamese film for me, although the environment and the context was of course Japanese.

The movie was very precise to the novel and the director didn’t take many liberations. The ones he decided to take only made the film more whole.

I was a bit afraid the movie would be a hollow trunk like Jun Ichikawa’s movie version of Tony Takitani. And honestly, I’m happy that Ichikawa wasn’t directing. It is clear that Tran Anh Hung was perfect man for the job.

Clearly he has worked very hard to make everything as true to it’s location as possible. The research alone must have required significant effort.

I imagine the movie itself will split audience in half which is expected and natural. And those who have read the novel are likely to enjoy it more.  Haruki Murakami is somehow all over the place in this film, there’s a lot of Beatles and the actress Reika Kirishima actually performs the song in the movie with her guitar. I was also delighted that Haruomi Hosono made appearance in the movie as the record shop owner.

Substance, Wanted

JPG MAG link

The bird asks the frog,

what do you know about flying,

about the way how wind can hurt?

This is for the toad that we remember,

when our webbed feet bleed

for the person who locked his door

with his empty words in North Point

For the hope that exists in the world of no hope,

I say no more

until my son meets his frog

 

Leica M8 Seduction

Leica’s M8 used to be a camera that I never really had interest to. Crop sensor, infrared issues (requiring filter) you know, it was Leica’s first attempt to make a digital camera and I read many negative reviews about it.

I just thought that I would rather go for M6 and get a full frame camera via 35mm film and be happy for the rest of my life.

But now, since M8’s price came down (in fact you can get used M8 with around same cost as Fujifilm X-PRO) I find myself attracted to this camera. M8 is less than half the price of M9, and still it is a real rangefinder Leica, and accepts all the great optics.

The shortcomings of the M8, such as poor JPG’s, requirement of infrared filter, and the crop sensor, doesn’t weight so much in my scale. For me I care much more about the spirit of rangefinder focusing, feeling connected to the scene you’re shooting.. and of course, the culture of manual photography which is so genuinely embraced by Leica.

You've Made it This Far

Getting tired is natural. We work hard to make something what we strongly believe in, and our energy drains out during the process.

When I was playing in a band in Tokyo, I often experienced this quite painful emptiness after the stage. I didn’t really know what to do the next day when I woke up. I could still hear the music in my mind, but the people before me had disappeared somewhere. Food had lost it’s taste and all I wanted to do was to return back to the stage. Play one more song and hang out more with my bandmates.

I put myself to it so much, I really loved to play for audience with my band members. It was great! And I suppose after the live, I always felt I had done something what I needed to do. Kind of burned myself away a bit, like a candle.

Doing my own photo shoot with a model in some location, somehow reminds me of that time in those smoky small live houses in Koenji. I still get same feeling of painful emptiness when the job is done; when the works are finally out of my hands. There’s really nothing you can do. You’ve put yourself to it, and you’ve got to release it; set it free.

It’s like giving a painful birth to a child, only to watch the child to mature and leave you alone. I’m talking about that kind of emptiness.

But what I notice now, after all these years, is that it does get easier every time.

If you are professional of your craft, you have to earn your living by what you do. You know how it goes and you will be empty at times but you learn how to ignore that feeling, and keep doing your job. Because your income depends on it.

Like in life, we shouldn’t ignore the emotions that arise, but still we must keep them in check somehow, because there are practical things we have to take care of.

Buddhist detachment might help in this regard. If we get distance, we can act more professionally. Doing something emotionally powerful will always bring up emotions in us, like it or not, and we must deal with them, but if we learn how to take distance to ourselves (sort of stepping away from the equation) it gets a whole a lot easier.

When it gets really hard, when under the weather, I tell myself: “Jaakko, you’ve made it this far! Look at yourself!”. Indeed, I’ve made this far. This is who I am and this is what I am. I was born this way, and I’ve chosen this path.