Copyright Jaakko Saari

Spring 2020


2021 in Yokosuka

In Switzerland, we’d drink Swiss beer
and life would be a joy

We would invite friends over
and ski in glittering white slopes

With precision of expensive handmade watch
we would wake up to our new life

A dream that is only a dream
in Switzerland

To take a photo

I took photo of my friend last weekend.

Over many years of taking photos, and thinking about photos, one feeling remains. For me it is very natural action to take a photo. I don’t feel unnatural feeling to hold a camera.

I have withdrawn to my dark and air-conditioned cave filled with the things I love. I can create any CG I want and make any music I want.

Then I look at the world outside my window.


Actually I took this last year. Despite the data getting grimmer, Japan is promoting Go to Travel campaign. It’s bizarre. Any non-essential travel should be minimized during a novel virus pandemic. This is a common sense.

I miss my hometown in Finland. I have no idea when I will be able to return. Maybe someday.

Why it hurts

My son used to cry during evenings. I asked him, “why do you cry?”. He said because he doesn’t want the day to finish.

When I take photo I feel like that. I don’t want the moment to finish.

I guess I can speak keigo, honorific Japanese. It’s not that difficult and after 13 years I should be able to add -masu and -desu to the words. Should be not rocket science.

Guys at the office complained that I speak too good Japanese, but that my Japanese is way too casual for work setting.

Somehow it just never sounds natural from my mouth. I can’t be myself in that way, I can’t relax and words don’t come from my mouth. I understand I am being rude speaking such casual way with strangers. But it’s not my intention to be rude or impolite. And actually using honorific words in wrong situation can also be rude, even more so I think.

There is no question how failed and imperfect person I am. But I think words should be spoken spontaneously and with good intention.